Drew Rozell, Ph.D.

Author and Coach

The Skeptic Always Finds a Reason

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I was reading through Seth Godin’s latest blog post this morning and his message struck a chord that’s worth sharing. You can read his post here to read it in full.

The line that stopped me was this :

“The skeptic always finds a reason.”

Here’s why it struck me.

I have a strong belief about life. I believe the thoughts we choose determine what shows up in our lives. I believe that it’s my mission to teach people how take charge of their thoughts and get out of their own way. I believe in what I do.

Underneath my belief as to how life works, there is a mountain of scientific evidence. Data. Proof. Cutting edge results from the world of quantum physics. In fact, there are heaps of studies from all different fields that reach the same conclusion: Your thoughts create your reality. Own your thoughts and you own you life. Fail to do so and you get what you get.

I feel so strongly about my message that I want everyone to get it. I can talk about it for hours. I can explain it logically. I can offer up the evidence. I can debate with skill.

But here’s the thing…

The cold truth is that will all my evidence and all my skill, I’ve never converted a skeptic. Not a one.

No matter how many facts I produce, no matter how seamless my logic, whatever I offer the skeptic falls into the abyss. We end up right where we started. Why? Because once a mind is made up, it’s nearly impossible for you to change it.

The skeptic always finds a reason. Always.

So here’s my takeaway point. I notice that when I am writing something like this or creating a new program, part of me is still writing to the skeptic. As a result, a significant part of my energy is being siphoned away, trying to prove my point so that everyone will get it.

But now I can see (and feel) how much energy I waste in that approach.  Not everyone wants to get it.  Entertaining the skeptic weakens my message, dilutes my intention, and takes me out of my creative flow. Now that I am aware of my tendency, I am making the decision to no longer do this.

I believe every one has something creative and unique to offer the world — a message, a signal, a product, and idea. However, the reason most people do not fully express themselves is because we have one eye on the skeptic. We figure if what we have to offer will be questioned or rejected by somebody, then it must not be worth sharing. And that’s a mistake that keeps us small.

The skeptics are not going anywhere. They will always be out there.

Acknowledge their presence.

But do not waste a second of your life trying to move them.

Walk around.

How Do You Start Your Day?

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IMG_3159-1

Just before sunrise. 1/13/10

How do you start your day?

Certainly there are an infinite number of potential responses to that question.

So let’s see if we can create a couple categories into which all potential responses could be separated.

Do you start your day DELIBERATELY?

Or NOT? (Best I could come up with  in the moment.)

While there’s not a right or wrong way between the two, I think there’s a better way.

Each day when you wake up, you start with a fresh slate. What you created in your life up to that point does not matter. What you struggled with the previous day or for the last couple decades is irrelevant.

The only thing that matters on this new day are the thoughts you choose because the thoughts you choose today determine what you create tomorrow.

When you take that in, I think that’s really awesome news, right?

Of course, taking advantage of this clean slate requires something of you. It requires you to deliberately focus your thoughts. It requires you to actively put your attention on that which you truly desire to create. While this process is not very difficult, it’s a habit. And it’s a habit most people do not practice.

Most of the time we wake up and let our thoughts go where they may. We follow our thoughts rather than consciously leading them.  Again, we begin each day with a fresh slate, but if we mindlessly connect to the same worries and concerns we had the day before, we give up that terrific opportunity to create something better in our lives. In short, we give up our power.

This is why how you start your day is so important. Begin your day by deliberatively guiding your thoughts to places that feel good, and you will attract more of that throughout your day.

Roll out of bed and let the headlines  (or your e-mail) decide where your attention goes, and well, you get what you get.

The practice of directing your thoughts to start the day is not hard.

Before you get out of bed, allow yourself five minutes. Allow yourself to connect to feelings of appreciation. The objects of your appreciation do not matter. Make it easy. Appreciate your bed. Your pillow. The warmth under the covers. Maybe you can appreciate the person next to you or cat who’s hogging all the bed space.

Do not try to solve any problems. Do not try to fix anything that’s awaiting you during your day.

Just appreciate. Just connect from one good feeling thought to another.

Next, perhaps you can allow yourself to think about your day and imagine things going well for you. See your day and feel it flowing they way you wish it to be.

When you feel good, get up and move about your day.

You are now ready to bring in the good stuff.

And yes, you can go pee now, too.

Dominant Thoughts Rule

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Okay, so we all know that the thoughts we choose to think determine what we create in our lives?

(We DO know that, right? 🙂

So what determines the thoughts we think?

More than anything, we choose the thoughts that are lying on top of the tool chest. We choose the most easily accessible thoughts and the most easily accessible thoughts are the ones we’ve practiced. The thoughts we practice over and over become our beliefs. Once a belief is in place, the process of choosing thoughts tends to operate on auto-pilot. In other words, once a belief is in place, we don’t expend much energy monitoring or directing our thoughts. This automatic processing of our thoughts can be a double-edged sword.

If your beliefs are aligned with your desires, awesome. You’re in good shape.

However, if the thoughts that are most easily accessible to you are not in line with your desires, your desires will continue to elude you. Chances are you’ll feel frustrated, like what you always seems just out of your reach.

Here’s a easy way to identify the thoughts that you have been practicing on any given subject. We’ll do a simple word association to determine what your DOMINANT THOUGHT is on a subject. Your dominant thought is powerful; it will tell us the entire story on what you are creating in your life.

First, pick a subject. Money is always popular because everyone wants more of it, so let’s go with that one for now.

So, write down the word on a piece of paper.

MONEY

Say it aloud. (Don’t worry, no one’s listening to you.)

As the words leave your lips, allow yourself to notice the first thoughts or feelings that come up within you.

Does the subject of money lead you to begin worrying about paying your bills? <WORRY>

Do you feel a sense of struggle about the subject? Like you keep trying, but never seem to get there? <STRUGGLE>

Or (let’s hope!) the subject of money evokes a feeling of freedom or adventure. <FREEDOM>

Just notice the thoughts and feelings that come up and write that word beside MONEY on your page.

Voila!

You now have your dominant thought about money.

(I suggest that you do this exercise with many topics and have fun exploring the programs that you’ve been running in your mind. Remember, those programs determine what you are getting in your life. Ignore them at your own peril. Other potential topics: Your body. Parenthood. Relationships. Career success. Hell, you could even check in on your dominant beliefs about airline travel, dining out, or general contractors. Any subject will work.)

Okay, once you know your dominant thought on a subject, you know the blueprint that exists in your mind. You have access to the plans and instructions that you are delivering to the universe to assemble on your behalf. You get what you think about and your dominant thoughts determine what we get.

At this point, most people recognize that on some important subject, their dominant thought is not in line with their desire. (No wonder it never shows up!).

Ack!

No need to panic. There are no problems, only solutions.

But moving through this situation and allowing your desires is not a passive process. No, you need to step up and take charge. You’ll need to become radically responsible for your thoughts and your life.

What does that mean?

Stay tuned…