I’ve read a couple posts lately from people celebrating their birthdays. One woman made it clear that for the whole week, she was going to allow herself to say YES to her desires.
I get it. I understand this woman’s intent and it’s perfectly cool. Yet reading her post, it got me thinking…
What is she doing with her desires for the other 51 weeks of the year?
Now, I know this person well enough to know that her default response to doing something fun is something like, “No, I’d really love to, but I can’t…”
And all her reasons are legitimate enough. So, so busy…
Work. Kids. House. Don’t have the money…
Under the heading of sacrificing for the greater good of others, she says NO to herself. Over and over. (And yes, I see plenty of men doing this as well.)
At the same time, I’ve watched her health deteriorate. In fact, now her health condition has become another reason she can’t say YES. She’s caught in the loop and she’s not yet willing to make the connection that subjugating her desires is not serving her well-being anymore.
The point here is a simple one…
If you want to have a great life where your desires consistently manifest easily, you’ll need to say YES to your desires… You’ll need to get out in the world, let your hair down (should you still have some), and connect to all the FUN that exists in the world.
I’ve yet to see someone get the love, fun, freedom, or money they truly desire in life from saying NO and denying themselves.
People deny their desires for one simple reason: they have learned to be afraid of wanting too much. Too much fun is dangerous. Too much fun is selfish. Too much fun costs too much money. Too much money is greedy.
Look a little deeper and you’ll notice that these decisions to say no are not really made consciously. In other words, they are more like reflexive responses, echoes of some past authoritative voice that’s still granted the power to direct your present life.
Saying NO to yourself does not make you wiser, richer, or more holy.
It just means you’re in the habit of putting off your desires and getting older without getting what you want.
You can do that. It’s perfectly fine to do so, but when you really think about it, it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense.
Life’s supposed to be a party.
But to be a part of it, you’ve got to show up and say YES to yourself.